Studies say that couples who can find comfort in silence display a high level of connection. Whether they’re walking the dog together or reading a book side by side, these couples can share a relaxed, mutual experience without needing words. But, what about the other kind of silence? What about the couples whose dinner conversations are now reduced to “pass the ketchup” and other pleasantries?
Generally, long-term couples are the ones who experience this disturbing silence. However, the length of relationship is not only the reason for losing the connection the couples once had.
In some cases, a partner’s silent treatment is because they got tired of their partner’s daily monologues. They no longer feel interested in engaging in a dialogue with their spouse, so they remain silent while their other half keeps on rambling about random things. There are also other cases wherein the couples suffered from a traumatic event, such as the death of a child or a serious injury that they avoid talking about it, and ended up avoiding each other, as well. Moreover, financial problems, infidelity, and other issues may contribute to a compromised communication between couples, too.
While most family law attorneys in Colorado Springs and other areas found this disquieting silence one of the reasons for divorce, there is still a way to recover that lost connection. Marriage counselors encourage couples suffering from this issue to reflect on themselves. Are you speaking/listening in a way that makes your partner want to listen/speak? Is your body language shutting down communication and intimacy? Once couples realize what they’ve been doing all these years communication-wise, it would be easier for them to reset their pattern of shared connection. They can start by doing a new activity and reaching a mutual goal together.
As long as the couples are willing to shush the silence between them, they can renew their bond with each other. After all, nothing beats sitting together and watching TV at home comfortably, not worrying about any awkward silence.